"Please take a number. Your call will be answered in the order it was received." It isn't as bad as a root canal or having the hot water run cold just as you are putting the conditioner into your hair, but it's no hot fudge sundae. Waiting. In line. On the phone. At the superstore. In school. Anywhere. No fun...

Before reading any further, be forewarned: this is not a story for the weak of heart. It is filled with snakes, destruction, filth, war and loss. But every word is true. I know. I lived it. The other day my 8-year-old called me into the bathroom. With a frown, he pointed downward. My eyes followed his path to the toilet bowl, which was filled with yellow water and a bright red Matchbox car...

In previous columns, I defined parenthood as an infinite act of optimism. You enter the job with open arms and an open heart, trusting the child you've been entrusted with will learn, grow and love under your humble tutelage. Loving one child is optimistic -- two, doubly so. Imagine taking responsibility for 20, or maybe 25...

I love holiday music. When I hear the melody of "Silent Night" or "Jingle Bells," I can't help but join in. Fortunately, I know the words to just about every Christmas song ever written. Unfortunately, not many people love hearing me sing them. I'm not gifted in that regard...

It's been in the news, on the History Channel and even the Today show, so there's got to be a hint of truth to the story. The end is near. We've been informed the Mayan calendar ends this year on Dec. 21. Since the Mayan calendar does not go beyond the fourth Friday in December, some experts believe neither will we. The day of reckoning is predicted to occur right before Christmas. If that isn't a good reason to peek at your presents, I'm not sure what is...

My mom loved animals. She passed this wonderful gift on to me. Growing up, our house served as home to all sorts of critters. We owned hamsters, bunnies, an ever-expanding tank of fish and a parakeet named Snickers. When my fourth grade teacher needed a home for our classroom mice, guess who cleared a shelf for the beloved rodents? My mom...

Last weekend, my husband headed out on errands with a number of important items on his list. Toilet paper was one of them. There's a household product you don't want to run short on. He returned home from the store, toilet paper in hand. There was only one problem. He got double quilted double rolls. I always buy mega soft triple rolls...